Rambling and some doodles

Time for another update. It's been a while. It's always been a while!

Summer holidays are slowly coming to an end and I feel like this academic year is going to be really tough. This is the year I get my bachelor of American studies degree. I'm sweating bullets whenever I think about it! Last two semesters have been exceptionally difficult. I was barely getting by, trying to keep up with dozens of deadlines. It was not unusal for me to sleep only 4 hours a day and I lost count how many times I almost fell asleep during classes, haha. I closed my eyes and immediately started drifting away.

I don't regret starting those studies, though. But I sure wish they were a bit less demanding and time-absorbing, there's tons of obligations. For example, last semester we received 200-page readings every week, half of them in English. It would have been totally okay if they were on paper - but they were all PDF files. Holy cow, I hate reading articles on screen, nothing else makes my eyes burn so much. I'd rather read 500 pages in traditional form than 50 pages in PDF. Sigh...

I wish I had more time to draw, too. I remember how I used to doodle something each day in junior high school. I miss that! Now when I finally have time to draw, I'm often too worn out to do it. I'd like to be less apathetic. I'd like to be less passive.

The weather doesn't help either.. I loathe Summer. I swear I've never experienced such terrible heatwaves in my whole life. Droughts seem to haunt all European countries this year. Temperature drops every now and then but rain is a scarcity. Our climate is changing and I miss the four Seasons. We didn't have Winter for 2 years now. Also, I'm pretty sure I have a photophobia because I don't tolerate sunlight at all, it gives me nothing but headaches. Please go away, Summer, and try to be less hellish next time.

I'm relieved I'll be coming back to Cracow soon. It's not that I like Cracow - I don't - but it's hard for me to live with my family after moving out once. I think we grew apart. My dad doesn't like it how I sit in my room all day every day. Well, dad, give me a reason to leave it - stop getting yourself drunk. My dad is relatively harmless while being drunk, yet he's pesky. He used to be a healthy man but all the drinking is gradually destroying him. I hate seeing that but my hands are tied.
I see how easily fatigued he is. He has trouble breathing. And he snores in the most horrifying way possible. Dear Lord, his snoring... That loud, obnoxious, infernal snoring. You wouldn't believe a human being is capable of making sounds like that! Everyone knows about his drinking problem but he would never admit he's addicted. He doesn't want to do anything about it. For him, it's easier this way.

I wanted to join some art community this year but I chickened out. AGAIN. It's hard to break this wall of isolation I've built. If you use art sites, please don't abandon them. There are always people eager to support you and it's unwise to push them away! Motivation is exceptionally difficult to find if you don't have folks to share your work with.

I dunno where to go, though. I hate Facebook. I find tumblr convenient on the one hand, yet alienating on the other hand. I don't know what to use Twitter for. DeviantART is as dead as a doornail. Weasyl? Nah.

I'm considering FurAffinity because it's simple and friendly. But then again, I probably wouldn't be very active on it because of my studies. Bleugh, I don't like making decisions like this! You know, I don't want to make a 'comeback' and then go on another hiatus just after a couple of weeks..

Okay, there's doodles to share! I've been scanning and photoshopping them recently. I won't post them in chronological order because I've already lost track, haha. But some of them might be from 2014!

The first kangaroo I've drawn in years. Gosh, it's so crappy! I'm posting it just because I like the colours. My second attempt was somewhat better:

...!

Oldie but (kinda) goodie. Haven't posted a single picture of admiral for two years. Two. Years. I feel bad whenever I think about this :c He's been aroud but he's still insanely difficult for me to draw. I'd post more admirals if I could draw them better. It's a shame when you can't draw your own characters.

I've never encountered a friendly goose in my whole life. They tend to be really agressive if you once approach them. Please don't give them breadcrumbs if you don't want to lose your fingers!

When I was a kid, my neighbour told me she had 2 imaginary peacocks. She kindly gave me one of them, thus I received my first imaginary friend, haha. I named it Paw (pronounced: Pav), which means... Peacock! I always imagined it to be very disheveled because I rarely remembered to take care of it. I guess Paw still exists since I've never got rid of it!

I sketched this around Easter, I think? I totally ripped off Grumpy Inspector's bunny suit from the Easter edition of Subway Surfers. Admiral certainly doesn't approve being turned into a furry!

(not Marcel)

Ugh, this comic is old. Boatswain is very superstitious. And captain has literal interpretations of anything he says!

(Nooo, Blogger resized it! Click here to view it in my Dropbox)

Mind games are boatswain's speciality. He's exceptionally good at telling lies, too. And admiral can be really easy to manipulate sometimes. Perfect!

Cappin bought himself chocolate. Cappin forgot where he had put the chocolate. Cappin devastated.

Based on true events! I found my chocolate, though. It was gross because I left it in the basement!

I am the bluesman. I speak for the trees!

Doodled these for practise before I started photoshopping this:

... I don't usually post gifts that have already been given but I wanted it to be here. I still like it. And gosh, I like Sarah's character Neverwell a whole awful lot <3

Kreska and Bibułka. I miss them so much :( I still can't stop thinking about my guinea pigs, even though it's been months. When I moved out for the first time, I worried they might forget me. Well, nothing could be further from the truth! They instantly recognized me each time I visited - and their happiness was probably the best part of those visits. They weren't just pets, they were friends, ones that never forget nor betray you. We aren't completely apart - they often come back to me in my dreams. I'm glad dreams always feel so real.

I learned about Masha and the Bear via Sarah's Twitter and I'm eternally grateful you posted those tweets! Thank you so much! It's one of my favourite present-day shows, haha. It may be for kids but it's actually really good! It uses lots of classical gags and slapstick we all know and love. I wish they made more cartoons like this!

Fav characters from Inside Out (I screwed their proportions)! This time a thank-you goes to Ima because you recommended me to watch the movie! So thank you! When I saw the trailer, I didn't expect it to be great, yet it was AMAZING. Very wise and touching. I watched it twice at the cinema and I can't wait to get it on DVD to watch it some more, haha.

Oops, I'm not happy with how this came out at all. Boatswain and Patrick in some Scooby-Doo-ish situation. I'm not a big fan of that show but I always liked Velma and Shaggy.

Two unhappy boatswains. I drew the latter bos during one of the worst heatwaves. He hates heat nearly as much as I do!

It is not the first time this happened, haha. Admiral seems to be perpetually cursed with bad luck. Things often backfire against him, even if he had good intentions in the first place. It's not uncommon for him to take responsibility for somebody else's actions. Most of his courtesy is now buried under a thick layer of bitterness.

I removed my characters' pages from my charahub. Don't worry, though! I did this because I'm planning to redo them completely when charahub V2 is out. The old ones made me cringe. Also, my crew is probably a bit more developed now!

Out of them all, boatswain is by far the most assertive, even charismatic in his own way. He can be really impudent at times. He gets what he wants - the clay of him has been moulded (above all) by the harsh hands of society. For certain part of his life he was convinced that kindness can't take you anywhere; his main source of income was stealing. He was filled with hatred.

It was before he bumped into Patrick! He found him just at his door and, for the first time in many years, felt very sympathetic. He certainly could relate to that small tot, since bos himself is an orphan (he had loving and supportive parents but an illness took their lives). He decided to take care of the foundling and viewed it as a chance to change his life. It really paid off!

His relationship with captain is absolutely unique. He'd rather die than let anyone harm his beloved friend. Sometimes he's a bit too protective of Patrick, but it's not like he doesn't respect him. I'd rather say it's a well-balanced combination of care and esteem. He understands captain without words.

Boatswain's default expression is grumpy. He can be greedy and rude sometimes. He takes great pleasure in complaining! But he doesn't necessarily want to hurt anyone's feelings, it's just something he does out of habit. If you once adjust to his quirks, he's not all that bad.

Captain is... special. And has always been!

I never know how to say that without implying that he's dumb. He's slow and forgetful but not stupid. I like comparing his mind to a creek. Sometimes it's a creek in a valley - the water is muddy and the current is slow, but it carries his thoughts steadily, without effort. Ideas arrive late but in order. And sometimes it's a mountain creek. Its water is crystal clear and the flow is very fast, yet the creek itself is full of meanders and rocks. Thoughts arrive quickly but many of them are deformed. Some don't arrive at all.

Captain is meek and benevolent. He doesn't know much about the outside world. Boatswain brought him up in some kind of isolation - he didn't want him to be shaped by the same hands of society that once took away his own values. So far it worked out well! Patrick has a solitary nature, he doesn't mind companionship but enjoys being alone. He never developed any bitterness - in fact, he never had a single chance to.

He always remembers his practical skills (though he doesn't have many of them!) but has trouble memorising facts. Dates, numbers, names - captain constantly forgets them, including those related to himself. He's awkward, even though you might think he could be a good pianist with those thin fingers of his. Not at all! He's unintentionally destructive. Has already broken dozens of glasses. But Patrick has two great talents: comforting people and singing, and these make up for most of his flaws.

Being aloof and eccentric, admiral is difficult to approach. But he doesn't let that worry him. He doesn't like most people anyway.

His life is a series of unexpected twists and odd incidents. He's not even biologically related to his family, yet neither he nor his parents know about that. There are two sides of his personality and they're always conflicted. It may be why he's usually so restrained - he simply doesn't know how to feel.

His anger issues, however, are out of control. He never wants to let that show but he absolutely hates being laughed at. He semi-patiently tolerates other forms of teasing, yet not this one. Admiral secretly wishes he could learn how to laugh at himself but it's difficult. His beloved hobbies are cooking and gardening and these are often considered to be 'girly' by his acquaintances. It infuriates him!

Regardless of what others think, he's actually sharp-witted and very self-reliant. Some people assume he views himself superior to Poles because he's French. Nope! He doesn't give a damn about his ancestry. For one nation he's a stranger - for another he's a traitor. Admiral doesn't have a place he could call 'home'. It's everywhere and nowhere.

He's vain, thus a bit gullible. He loves being told compliments! He feels like he deserves them, haha. He doesn't like intimacy as much as he likes respect. There's no chance of getting on his good side without respecting him in the first place.

  

Last but not least: a little something for Sarah. Thank you so much for your gifts, support and everything you've done for me. It's genuinely appreciated! I feel lucky to have you as a friend! I'm sorry if I made any mistakes in Jolene's design. It was sketched before she received her reference sheet and I finished it just a few days ago!

To end this post on a positive note, I'll share one more thing with you. I made a doodle archive on Photobucket. Click here to visit it!

I'm not a big fan of Photobucket but it's good for keeping stuff organized, so I think I'll stick with it. Each pic is described with date of scanning or photoshopping. If you carefully keep track of my work, you're probably familiar with 97% of doodles I have there, haha.

I want them to be public, so everyone can access them. Hope you like it!